I Hope it's Just for the Likes - The Ratchet Facebook Status

(note - none of these statuses are edited or fabricated.)

Do you guys see where this is going?  Get ready...

I've said it before, and I'll say it again, Facebook was better (better meaning you didn't have to turn your screen at the job to use it) when you had to have a college email to use it.)  I've never been one to hold my tongue.  I'm outlandish, I'm rude, I'm petty.  These are all things you've probably gathered from reading here, or if you rock with me on social networks.  But the irony of the things I say are very rarely lost on me.  Outside of being prone to typos (the I before E thing haunts me to this day)  I'm fairly aware of the things I contribute to.  To the point where I've had "Come to Jesus" conversations with my mom (still gonna block you mom!) several times.  But my words, my links, even my retweets often pale in comparison to the portion of the population that only uses Facebook/twitter from mobile devices.

It went from zero to ratchet - REAL QUICK.

If you'd believe my timeline, these things would ring true - "niggas ain't shit, these heauxs ain't shit, if you ain't suckin' ya mans dick, that's why he's over here with me, we gettin' money and y'all ain't doin' shit, I hate my baby daddy, I hate my baby momma, real recognize real and you lookin' kinda unfamiliar (ok that one's lifted) and if you don't make this much and ya dick ain't this big, what are you bringing to the table?"

Yes, go read that back one more time, aloud if you have the freedom to.

Where did it all go wrong?  When did airing out all of your dirty laundry for the likes become what's hot in the streets?  I can't answer that, because I have neither the time or the motivation.  I'm just her for the li... to entertain.  If the opposite sex isn't treating you fairly in your estimation, that can be a problem.  We've all felt less than attractive, or less than appreciated,  at one point or another.  But proclaiming "he/she really ain't worth my time, I'm so over it"  proves that 1) they are worth the time for you to type it out and 2) WHENEVER someone says I'm over it, it's a clear signal that they aren't.  Think about it - have you ever told your parents "i ate all my vegetables"?  HELL NO, not unless you threw them shits away when they weren't looking!!!  It's against our nature to celebrate the things that upset us.  We say those type of things to inspire emotions in the other party, that is probably off doing something that makes them happy.  Right now.  While you waste time writing about them hoping that they see it!

Yeah... THAT'S why she isn't getting married. lolololololololololol.

Now as far as the heaux statuses go, man listen - man or woman, it's the ugliest part of a timeline.  Shocking? Yes.  Funny? Sometimes.  Offensive?  Always! People use Facebook as their own Talk show set, discussing the ins and outs of their sex lives for public consumption.  Which is all good, but you have to be ready for the backlash.  If you make a heaux status, and someone calls you a heaux, how can you be upset?  And who are you upset at?  Every time you hit that 'update status' option, you are giving the world a glimpse into who you are. and if you don't take the time to go over it, why should they take the time to examine it?  Everyone's not a comedian, and for the most part, you can gauge sometimes affinity for sarcasm.  Passing judgement isn't ideal, but stating that "I'll do what ya girl/guy won't" and getting offended when someone calls you out your name isn't being realistic.  Heaux.

... The more you know.

In short - self awareness will ultimately limit the lengths you'll go to for attention, and probably save you from a bunch or (rational) strangers calling you all types of jackasses and sluts.  Because if you didn't see the validity, you wouldn't get offended.  Jackass.