Without being vulgar, everything we do is influenced by our desire to be with others, i.e. sex (or whatever it is were calling it this week. Beating cakes anyone?). The way we dress, the things we say, the very way we move, is meant to draw others toward us. Why would our presence on the internets be any different? Since it’s inception into the mainstream, the internet has been heavy on personal communication. Which of us in the web 2.0 era can say we’ve never been in an AOL chat room? In 2011, online dating will become a near 1 billion dollar a year business, because of its ability to simplify the awkwardness of dating. The idea of someone paying to meet people is well, no different from what the majority of us do week in and week out. When you go to a bar, a club, a restaurant or any gathering place, you are in essence paying to meet people. You are just more willing to deal with direct rejection, whether you are the victim or assailant.
Internet dating is pretty basic. You build a profile, stating your sex, age range, location and interests. You let other people on the service you use know what you’re into, and they do the same. If your information matches up with someone, you begin to talk privately, in hopes of building something over time. Sounds easy, right? Wrong. Like dating out here in the real world, you can have all the things in common with a person, but not be attracted to them. The difference here is that you all are both looking, and presenting interest beforehand. There’s a big difference in meeting someone over the internet at 3 in the afternoon on a Sunday and meeting someone when you pissy drunk on a Friday night. Trust me, I've been there. The key difference is that rejection over the internet is both more humiliating and easier to accept at the same time.
Let’s say you find someone whose online profile matches your own. You talk, laugh, share stories and really hit it off. Then they realize the first four pictures in your profile were oh, thirty pounds ago, and they’re no longer interested. You put yourself out there, and you were shot down. It sucks. More than likely However, there are likely more people you have things in common with than the one you clicked with, and you aren’t dealing with someone you have to see on a regular basis, so getting over it is less of a task.
Where internet dating reaches its apex of strangeness is on web 2.0’s social networking sites. I remember watching the MySpace Exodus of 2009, thinking, “did so many lames hit on girls that they all up and left?” But in many ways, when internet dating isn’t restricted, or at least given some structure, the awkwardness reaches a new level. In an open world that doesn’t require a monthly fee, strange messages and “friend requests” from people you never met are the norm. This coupled with fake profiles and spam accounts do nothing but frustrate those expecting to meet real people, thus making them less socially integrated and created even more strange situations.
Online dating works for some, those us of too busy to leave relationships to much chance, and those of us more specific about what we want. The issue is that it eliminates the flair, and the intrigue from going out into the world and proving one’s self, showing that we can excel where others have failed. If I had to choose between going out and meeting people, or staying in and doing the same, I would almost always choose the latter, if for no other reason than the sense of satisfaction it brings. To those in the know, the internet (dating) is for geeks anyway. And who wants that label on top of being anti-social and creepy?
No comments:
Post a Comment