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| Time to play button the game |
It's been awhile, but now seems like a fitting time to pick the keys back up and do a little writing. It's just after SXSW, and days before the Texas Relays, so that means... to quote a certain wife of a certain video game music producer... it's WRESTLEMANIA! This year's a bit different, as it's the first time we won't be attending the live event in a few years. But, this gives me a better opportunity to watch this like I watch the rest of the shows. I tend to get a bit lost, being around all those people, taking in all the different sights and sounds, so this year will feel a bit closer to home. So, after all this prefacing, let's cover the card match by match, and try to get a feel for the winners, losers, and happenings of this year's event.
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| Hardest gang in Cana- I mean Swi- nvm. These guys can go. |
Fatal 4 Way for the WWE Tag Team Titles - New Day (Big E/ Kofi Kingston) v. Los Matadores v. The Usos v. Cesaro/Kidd (c)
If nothing else, this is a great way to put some energy and athleticism into a show that, on the surface, seems to lack it. All four of these teams are athletic, with the champs and New Day both having a nice mix of speed and power. As competitors, I'm a fan of all four teams, even though I dislike the Los Matadores gimmick, and LOATHE the New Day gimmick (side note: white folks chant "new day" ironically.... it's that bad) to the point that I can't actually CHEER the guys on. The Usos are, to me, the "it" team right now. The can move, their offense is believable, and they seem to really shine in pay-per-view matches. I'd much prefer a standard tag match between them and the champs. Tyson Kidd should be applauded for accepting a long term demotion to NXT, making guys look great, and making the most of his return to the main roster. I hate seeing Cesaro slotted as anything other than a top tier singles guy, but he's held his own as what I'd call the complimentary piece of that team. I'm picking the champs to retain in a very fast paced, hard hitting match. Winners - Cesaro/Kidd
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| "Just wait on it!" - Migos |
Randy Orton v. Seth Rollins
Seth Rollins is making the most of his opportunity as a major player in WWE. Cliche as it sounds, I think it's the biggest compliment you can bestow on a guy. He went from (by design) the third wheel in the hottest act in wrestling, to the top in ring heel in wresting almost seamlessly. What more impressive is that he did this during the transition to long, drawn out promos that people would groan at in chat rooms and Facebook groups. He was an indy darling, a minor league all star, and is now in position to have a major role in the world's largest wrestling promotion for years to come. He put on size, adapted to WWE's in ring style, but kept enough on his athleticism to still stand out. You believe he's a snake, but that if need be, he can hit you in the mouth hard enough to make it count. Plus, a Jon Stewart co-sign doesn't hurt. In many ways, he's what Randy Orton SHOULD be. That's not to say Orton is bad by any stretch. But I don't look at this match as Orton being the big star Rollins gets to test himself against. This is the Rollins show, and he's almost at that level where, win or lose, he's going to come out looking stronger than before. These two are so good in the ring, you know you'll see magic happen, hopefully it isn't lost in the shuffle of all the higher profile matches. Going into a Mania match with the MITB briefcase, and the uncertainty in the main event (we'll get there) I see Rollins losing clean to a kind of returning conqueror Orton. Winner - Randy Orton
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| Not a big fan... but them jerseys though... |
AJ Lee/ Paige v. The Bellas
I don't watch 'Total Divas'. I watch PLENTY of terrible "unscripted" things, but that isn't one of them. But I can say this - as the Bellas have gotten more famous, they've gotten SO MUCH BETTER in the ring. Whether it's the new found attention, or the pressure of the NXT Women breathing down their necks, they've taken their craft way more seriously than before. AJ and Paige? You don't have to question their skill set at all. With the show being as long as it is, you hope they get enough time to really go out and show what they can do. AJ jumped on twitter and told her bosses the truth about the world, and in my experience, that very rarely produces the desired results, so it's tough to pick her team to win. However, eventually the Bellas have to lose, right? They always seem to come out on top if for no other reason than to be more annoying the next go round. So perhaps, to show there's no hard feelings (yeah right) the better team gets the nod. Winners - AJ Lee/Paige
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| Andre hovering over MAD create-a-players |
Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal
Cesaro won last year, and he's on the pre-show this year. This won't get many words from me. I hope Mark Henry eliminates a bunch of guys, Axel does something hilarious, and the guy I'm picking to win has a good year after he wins. Winner - Damien Sandow (Mizdow)
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| My finger being the 1, to signal the 1, in 21-1 |
Bray Wyatt v. The Undertaker
I was in the building when Taker lost his first Wrestlemania match. It was the largest crowd of silent people this side of Mecca. I was pretty sure it was the very last time we'd be seeing the Undertaker in a WWE ring, and I was fine with the send off. Now, he's back. It all just seems so forced. I dig Bryatt Wyatt as a character, as an athlete, as a performer. He moves great for his size, has a great look, and just seems like he could mess you up if need be. It's certainly a natural fit for the psychedelic cult preacher to want to take down the local immortal Specter. It's just about a year too late. There's really no reason to have the Undertaker lose this match, as starting a negative streak for a guy that is a special attraction lessens the special. And Bray can talk that hot shit the very next day and have his mojo back. Have to go with the Dead Man here. Winner - The Undertaker
Come back Friday, 3/27, for my picks in the IC Title Ladder Match, US Title Match, Icon vs. That One Guy Match, and the WWE World Heavyweight Title Match!
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